Dear Anthropologie,

I am in a huge dilemma.

I just looked at your website.

Bad idea.

Now I want everything in your store.

The problem is, I only have a $20 gift card.

I don't think that can cover everything in your store.

I don't even think that can cover one thing in your store.

Now don't get me wrong, I LOVE the gift card and the cute little pouch it came in, I am just trying to figure out how that will cover all of my expenses.

So, here is where I would like to ask you a favor.

We will just keep it our little secret.

I am wondering if there is any possible way you could maybe just pretend that there is $5000 on the gift card instead of $20.

Ok ok let's just do $2000. I am ok with that. I can cut down my purchases. I don't have to have EVERY single thing in the store.

You just have the most beautiful clothes, how can I narrow it down?

Of course you know what I mean.

Anyway if you could give me a response any time before the mall opens at 10:00 today, I would really appreciate it.

Love, Annelise